I actually titled this post ‘feeling inadequate/irrelevant online’ and typed out paragraph after paragraph which sounded like a giant pity party when I read it back. It’s no secret that I’ve been feeling a bit demotivated and uninspired with blogging recently; I’ve been struggling with my images and having ideas but no way to execute them, it’s not been the most creative time for me! I’ve also read a few posts recently that, instead of celebrating bloggers doing well (which we should do, really), they’ve just bitched and moaned that they’re not getting the same opportunities without actually putting in any of the effort that those bloggers do. So, instead of letting the online world get to me, I thought I’d turn this into some motivation both for myself and for anyone who needs to turn that frown upside down.
Instead of Being Jealous
Strive to do better. Jealousy is so ugly, especially when it manifests itself in constant negative thoughts in your brain. Who cares if she has a nice handbag? Or she has more followers than you? When it comes down to it, are those things the most important things you could be focusing your energy on? Of course, everyone makes flippant comments every now and then – I know I do, bloody bloggers on holiday when all I want is a beach haha – but have you actually bothered to put in a 10th of a effort that those girls do on a daily basis. No one handed them their opportunities on a plate, they all worked for them and they work damn hard too – Lydia and Victoria are two people I admire oh so much for that.
Instead Of Wishing You Were As Pretty As That Girl
Remember that you already are. Beauty is such a weird little social construct. What some people perceive as beauty, others think is the most hideous thing ever. Sure, some women are absolute babes to the majority of people, but their beauty does not diminish yours. You are amazing in your own right and never forget it.
Instead Of Wanting To Do Your Makeup Just Like Her
Learn how to do it? If you want those brows to be ‘on fleek’ or your highlighter to gleam like a glazed doughnut, then learn how to do it. There’s so many perfect makeup looks on Instagram, but remember, a) half of them are edited beyond belief, your skin will never be as smooth as a plastic barbie doll and b) they all started in the same place and at the same level. There’s literally thousands of resources online to learn how to do makeup, whether that’s youtube or blogs or even popping down to your local makeup counter – so many of them will teach you the things you want to know!
Instead Of Wanting To Have A Body Like Her
Accept it or change. I’ve said I wanted to lose weight about a thousand times over the past 6-8 months and I’ve finally just decided to put down the pizza and sort myself out – I’m 4lbs down already and all it took was for me to ask myself why I was wishing I could change without actually doing anything. Again, similarly with makeup looks, there’s a whole host of unrealistic images out there so do remember that some bodies literally don’t exist (or at least not healthily), but if you want some abs or a booty you could balance a glass on then get off your arse and work for it! Or, if you’re going for the accept it side of things, then stop beating yourself up about everything. Be happy with who you are and learn to appreciate the body you have – it might take some time but you’ll get there.
Instead of Wishing You Could Take the Same Photos
Again, learn how to do it! You don’t necessarily need a fancy-ass camera, just study and research what you can do with the one you have. If you do want to invest, you can always get one second-hand or even combining a cheaper body with better lenses can work a dream if you learn how to use them properly. There’s plenty of resources to read, again, online and so many bloggers to get some inspiration or tips from. Sidenote: Copying their style, however, is so boring. Be yourself and develop your own style, you’ll feel so much better for it (and everyone won’t think you’ve got no imagination, either).
Instead of Wishing You Had More Followers
Maybe try and gain them? If gaining an online following is your aim (for whatever reason, it doesn’t matter) then actually make some effort to grow them. Talk to people in blogger chats, follow people yourself, ask questions in posts to get some dialogue going, comment on other peoples blogs, post consistently so people actually have something to read, promote your posts on social media and tag brands so they can share. Once you get started, it’s not all that hard to push yourself out there, it just takes time and a bit of dedication – you can read some of my blog tips for help if you like. In today’s day and age, everyone wants to achieve their goals overnight and it rarely happens, so there’s no point moaning about what she has when you’re doing nothing to better yourself.
I hope this gave some of you the kick up the ass that you needed! And, if you still want to have your own pity party, then have it, eat some chocolate or have a super long shower then get over yourself and do something about it.
Helen x
Check out these two amazing blogs: Oh Kalu Kalay and Mrs James Recommends!
